Pie chart of a typical New Zealand statistic
With the exception of New Years Day on the Millennium, and the climbing of Mount Everest, New Zealand has never really been the first at anything. In fact, it’s unlikely we’ve ever even been in the top ten. We simply lack the population to, say, win all the gold medals at the Olympics, or become the worlds biggest consumer of pitted olives.
But, by a clever manipulation of the statistics, we can put ourselves firmly at (or near) the top of any international pissing contest. The importance of this, towards alleviating our deep national fear of being ‘basically irrelevant’ to the rest of the world, should not be underestimated.
The most important example of the use of ‘per capita’ statistics is at the Olympic Games. By application of some questionable calculations, two silver medals and a bronze (in such high profile sports as windsurfing, archery and lawn bowls) can be inflated along the lines of..”and obviously, if we were the size of China, it would be equivalent to winning 2500 gold medals, which puts us 3rd in the population-adjusted medals table, behind Cook Islands, and one of those tiny African countries with all the crazy marathon runners…”
Other classic examples of ‘per capita’ manipulation of statistics to help us feel slightly less insignificant in the eyes of the world include..
- More radio stations than any other country in the world (per capita).
- More cars on the road than any other country in the world (per capita).
- More sheep, per person, than any other country in the world.
- The highest rate of teen suicide in the world (per capita).
- The fourth highest number of prisoners in the world (per capita, sitting proudly behind USA, Mexico & Poland).
In situations where ‘per capita’ manipulation fails to yeild favorable results, Kiwis like to resort to another old favorite, self-congratulatory, statistical qualifier; “…in the southern hemisphere.”
Examples of which, let us feel immense pride at having, among other things..
- The tallest building (in the southern hemisphere)
- The biggest movie screen (in the southern hemisphere)
- The highest rate of domestic violence (in the southern hemisphere)
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This site definitely has alll of the information and facts I needed conccerning this subject
and didn’t know who to ask.
http://www.stuff.co.nz/sport/olympics/7400581/NZ-third-in-population-based-medal-race
I wouldn’t feel as if you should be using loincloths made of dingo skin, as good as we’ve been place to formulate. Around we understand it’s importance figuring out, it is really hip.
Hej.Gratulacje z powodu bardzo dobrze napisanego kawalka.Duzo mozna znalezc w sieci na taki temat ale tutaj autor wszystko przedstawia jak trzeba.Hej!
Here are a few “per capita” statistics we should NOT be proud of.
These are NZ’s OECD and World rankings (per capita)
Worst country for
*Suicide rates in ages 15-24
*Melanoma Rates
*Cannabis use
*Property crime victims
*Car ownership – 720 per 1000 people, even more than the USA’s 675 per 1000 (2005)
*Rates of driveway deaths in the developed world
*Rape victims In NZ only 9% of sexual offences get reported to police, and of those only 13% of rapes resulted in convictions. The median age of victims is 23 and Europeans account for 61% of the victims – See ‘Conviction rate in sex cases‘
*McDonalds Restaurants per $GDP
see also: Teenager dies in death pact
2nd worst country for
*Suicide rates in ages 25-34
*School bullying
*Total crimes per capita
*Car occupant deaths resulting from collision with car, pick-up truck or van
*Imprisonment rate in the Western World
*Total crime victims
*Asthma prevalence
*McDonalds restaurants per capita
*Immigration foreign population
*Personal income tax
3rd worst country for
*Rate of obesity in the OECD
*Adults prosecuted per capita
*Child maltreatment deaths
*Assault victims
*Teenage pregnancy
*Lone parent families
*Students finding school boring
*Amphetamine use
*Motor Vehicle Deaths
*Imports of brown coal (lignite) per capita
*Loss of electrical power between source and destination
7th fattest country in the world
62.7% of New Zealanders are obese according to the WHO, Kids watching too much TV and ‘modern development’ mostly to blame
8th worst country for Economic Crime (Fraud)
* See PWC Economic Crime Survey
For Road Death and Injury Statistics, see: Road Death Toll.
this is fuckin nothin i had a project and it done fuckin idiot nothin
Thank god for you magnificient bastards, this per capita thing has been driving my friends and I mad for years, in fact I think you may have monitored our conversations before staring this site. Well played sirs, well played.